I begin again

Time flies... i agree :)
Since it has taken me so long to get back to writing I realise it will not be easy to just start with something new and interesting or even relevant. So I have decided to let this blog be about all things random. I simply do not have the energy to sort through my thoughts and develop a logical, planned write up on a particular subject.


To start off with...I am typing on my new DELL Vostro. Its beautiful and mine. OURS. Technically because it was Mat who paid for it but i am using it and will be taking it with me when I go to Papua New Guinea in September.


I considered giving it a name but the excitement of having it with me and the desire to start using it put all other thoughts off my mind. Now I believe its too late. My Dell will remain as,'it'.


Onto other topics equally mundane; I came across a whole series of blogs that where authored by women on make up! and they have giveaways and competitions and so much of traffic flowing through. I was amazed and drawn like a moth to flame. Couldn't wait to take part in one of the comps and win some 'mac' or 'bobbibrown'. sigh.


The only draw back was the things you need to do to qualify. Like publicly follow them on google friend connect - which btw I ddnt know existed. The women writing those blogs sound so happy, cheerful, pink. They are what women who talk abt make up sound like. I love make up. Adore products and all things madly expensive but I cant write abt it... I think to myself, what a waste. I would rather use the product and review it.


Often I find myself wanting to review a certain restaurant, play, shampoo but the inclination stops there. Although the words have formed in my head. I never manage to put it down on paper or screen.


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I shared this blog with a friend today. I did so a little embarrassed and hesitantly. I found myself trying to recollect all the things I have written here and resisting the urge to sit and go through all my old posts. After sharing it, my friend had a look and came back saying that it felt as though I was walking alongside rambling.


It made me feel a little better but the I am still not completely at ease.


I thought it would be a good idea to give an update on some of what has been happening in my life.

• I have a camera - gifted to me by Mat which I carry around everywhere. Mat degardingly referred to it as the 'Mummy Cam' i.e. Point and shoot. 
• I am working at an organisation I had dreamed I would one day be working for. The salary sucks but the people and work is amazing.
• I have made more friends over the last two years than I have over the last 24 years. 
• I am part of Rotaract. I love it. 
• I have been out of touch with the drama scene and although I miss it - I haven't done anything about it 
• I am leaving my awesome organisation and travelling to Papua New Guinea in September to work on HIV&AIDs communications. I will be gone for a year. 
• I desperately hope it happens. 
• I have become lazy and although I am involved in a crazy amount of projects, initiatives and groups I am not doing much of anything and this is driving me mad. 
• I suck at being a wife. I don't cook. I hate cleaning. I am never home. I make a mess of the room every morning. I am only successful at doing laundry.

Going to close this post cos I have lost my train of thought! :( 

Yay! leave approved. Hope to leave the country on the 12th of November. Don't quite know what I am going to do once I get there other than the shopping for the wedding but not too worried about that either considering there is never nothing to do there. A little concerned however about the total lack of planning in terms of daily stuff like the list i need to shop for, where should i go for those things, will i have time to myself to go explore the city and get lost and find my way again, how many clothes do i take, will a lot of my time go on religious stuff or visiting and worse yet; will i end up spending too much of time going there and then trying to figure out what to do...

I have asked my mom for a list of the things she wants me to get and as of now I am heavily dependent on my sis-in-law to be for guidance once I get there. I haven't even thought about where if I got the opportunity would i want to go and explore or see more off. Wonder if I'll have enough time to go to Bangalore or Surat... sigh.

i like lists and right now that's the one thing i don't have and am beginning to feel a little overwhelmed by all that is going to happen in the coming weeks; exams, Ella (no idea about this either), work and India. Also what are my Dad's and sister's plans in all of this especially are we all flying to mumbai together or should i just leave on the 12th and let them join me once my sis gets her visa sorted and my dad the cash.

Work is a big problem, I don't think Shehani will be able to take all the pressure. The way I see it i don't even have enough time to brief her thoroughly enough before I leave. Its worrying to say the least.

Exams - i have been so caught up in trying to get work sorted that I haven't even touched my books much less attempt past papers or anything. The analysis is still incomplete. Oh God panic state is approaching real fast and although i realise its not helping me in anyway to go there i am just walking in the dark. Worrying is what i do best it seems.