saying whats on your mind, out loud is supposed to be good for you right? so why then do i not feel so good about it? Was thinking about how I felt the first time I told sweets I loved him. It wasnt pleasant. After saying it I cried. Then I thought about my last post and how silly and slutty I felt. About how guilty and awful I feel whenever I tell sweets that everything isnt right with us. Maybe there are somethings you should not say aloud, like the important things, things that bug you the most and those that you cant wait to talk about. It the latter that causes the trouble.
Another thought, is it possible that the first person to say the three magic words in a relationship always is more in love than the other? Bubbs used to think so. Even I did for sometime but now I think maybe not. Maybe its just that the other one was too chicken to say it before, maybe he just wants to be sure, but then again; maybe he is reconsidering and you are making a total idiot of yourself by professing your love. Maybe then telling him you love him isnt the best idea. I know sweets loves me and i dont think i really want to measure just how much simply cos i know i couldnt measure how much i loved him. Its infinite. Yes. but then why didnt he say it first? what took him so long? are the little annoying questions that have plagued me since. Think there should be a rule, to say that it should be the guy who says it first. Simply cos girls think too much about it otherwise. Having said that I think I have wasted enough space on this blog. Will dedicate it to more constructive musings..... eventually.
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