I love weddings! not the usual bohra weddings (those i hate) but church weddings. And there is one coming up next month. cant wait:)

How complicated things become, even the most simplest plots are never all that simple afterall.

Am finally done with exams. YAY!!! feels good but there is that niggling thought at the back of my head that results will come in a month & i'll have to sit for the same papers all over again. What bothers me the most is knowing i wouldnt be worrying like this if i had actually gotten down to proper studying a little earlier, especially after knowing that i wouldnt get the chance with the event & all. Urrgghh! Regrets. Hate regretting. Silly ner to regret doing things after purposely getting into the mess? How pointless...

Wish we had the convenience of a pensieve. Would be great to put thoughts aside & examine them one at a time. This is a request from very depths of my heart cos I am a born worrier. No matter how obsessively i chew my lips & frown, my worries dont cease to hound me.
However what i want to do right now is call my dad & yell at him. Have been itching to do that for the past couple of weeks. Nevermind that.

It isnt fair of me to belly ache this way when its the most wonderful time of the year. Its christmas & i've been waiting for it for so long (12 months! I know!) but x'mas isnt x'mas without presents. And it sure doesnt feel like x'mas when you dont have a secret santa, a bonus & then you are told that because you took leave for exams and you find that you have utilised more than your share of leave, your salary is being deducted. X'mas sure can suck in the best ways imaginable. The dissappoitment with everything is more especially cos it is Christmas!

To hell with it all.

two sides to everything

this has been one of the most hellish days where everything I have worked towards seems to be falling apart and I have no one to blame but myself.

How is it that anyone could get carried away so effortlessly? every once in a while I think to myself what it would be like not have to think of the consequences of whatever it i do. I know i cant be alone in this but that doesnt stop me from feeling lonely. Keep telling myself that the sun will at some point but then the thought of going home makes even the rays of the sun fall weak upon me...

uuurrgggh! have to snap out of this, i shall, i will, i must. hate the fact that i am so dependant on some one else making this day better for me. shdnt it ideally be my reaction to what ever situation arises that determines how good or bad my day will be? Or is it all about how fast i push past my troubles and wait for that someone special to come swim through these troubles and hold me close and say, "it's going to be alright sweets"